Embrace single motherhood God’s way

{Lately, I’ve been having a hard time embracing single motherhood. Raising a child alone is something I’ve always looked down upon. How could a woman be so foolish to have a child with a man who isn’t willing to consistently care for his seed? Well, now I’m “that” woman.}

On December 28, 2018, I remember crying out to God through the hand-written words in this journal entry. Cori, my now rambunctious two-year-old daughter, was just two-months-old at the time. The challenges of single parenting were weighing heavy on me; I was physically and emotionally drained, spiritually lost, and angry with God.

Almost a year prior, I was in what I thought was the best season of my life. At the time, I was a 24-year old journalist climbing the TV News ladder. After three months of job searching and putting a dead-end relationship behind me so I thought, I had finally accepted a News Reporter position in my second market. I thought I was living the dream, but the success was short-lived. Just a month into working my new position, I learned I was pregnant.

The next nine months were a blur. I made the decision to quit my dream job and move back home with my parents. Throughout my pregnancy, I had very little contact with my daughter’s father. Our relationship had become too toxic to hold together. At some point, I accepted the fact that I would most likely be raising this child by myself.  

Before I knew it, after 16 hours of intense labor, I was holding baby Cori in my arms. The joy I felt was unexplainable. All of the trials I had faced up until this point were all worth it. Nevertheless, for every mountain peak, there’s a valley that follows.

The most challenging months of my life followed. Sleepless nights, changing diapers, bottle feedings every two hours, and countless tears cried. I remember it all, and the worst part was having to endure it alone. My physical and emotional exhaustion caused spiritual damage. I felt so far from God. I knew I had pushed myself into this predicament, but I often questioned why God would allow it.

Two years later, I’m finally learning to confidently walk in my purposeful role as a single mother. I’m embracing every struggle and every victory, all thanks to God transforming my heart and renewing my mind.

Are you a #savedsinglemommy fighting the feelings of guilt, shame, and worthlessness? Take these steps to embrace single motherhood God’s way;

Uproot the enemy’s lies

“We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ,” {2 Corinthians 10:5 (NASB)}

The enemy is the father of lies. He is opposed to God and will do anything in his power to turn us away from Him. Yet so often we succumb to the enemy’s temptation, mistaking his lies for truth.

One of my greatest challenges as a #savedsinglemommy is fighting off lies from the adversary. For so long, I walked in the spirit of guilt and shame. I believed the toxic thoughts that entered my mind; “A child is too much baggage, you’re not worthy of love,” “You’re child won’t be as successful as a child that grows up in a two-parent household,” “Having a child out of wedlock is unforgivable.”

It’s so important to uproot the enemy’s lies and walk in God’s truth. As God’s word says, silence the devil and take every evil thought captive to the obedience of Christ. That means casting down anything that doesn’t line up with who God says you are.

Live in God’s truth

“You did not choose Me but I chose you, and appointed you so that you would go and bear fruit.”{John 15:16 (NASB)}

To live God’s truth you must know God’s truth. When you accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, you become a new creation. Your identity is no longer defined by what you’ve done or what people think of you, but in Christ, the one who offers unconditional and everlasting love.

Once I started believing God’s truth, I developed new-found confidence… what some may call GOD-fidence. Other people’s opinions no longer mattered, neither did my own. I am who God says I am. Because of Jesus, I am chosen, I am worthy, I am forgiven and I am loved.

Knowing God’s word won’t stop the enemy from tempting you with lies. Nonetheless, when you put on the armor of God and fight evil with truth, the devil will flee. In the words of famed Christian artist Chandler Moore, God is a man of his word. If he said it, believe it.

Walk in God’s purpose

“And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” {Romans 8:28 (NASB)}

God has a purpose and a master plan for all of his children, yet so often we question whether we’re walking in his perfect will, especially when we fall short of his glory.

I was once that person. I walked in so much guilt and shame throughout my pregnancy and even after I gave birth. I felt like having a child out of wedlock was unforgivable. I just couldn’t understand how God could use me. Yet now, as I’m writing this blog post, I realize God is using me… using my testimony to push other #savedsinglemommies closer to him.

Remember, nothing is a surprise to God, not even your shortcomings. Consider your trial as a stepping stone to greatness. For those of you who love God and who are called according to his purpose, He’s working it out for your good!

Sincerely,

The Saved Single Mommy

Do you want to choose Jesus as Lord and Savior of your life? 

Pray this prayer;  

Dear Lord Jesus,

Thank you for dying on the cross for my sin.

Please forgive me.

Come into my life. I receive You as my Lord and Savior.

Now, help me to live for you the rest of this life.

In the name of Jesus, I pray.

Amen.